Leadership Coaching - Ch 1

Summary

Most people sign up for coaching to get help from experts so that they can achieve goals that they have a hard time accomplishing on their own. (Stoltzfus, p.6) That's what coaches do, they're "change experts." How do you help a person change? A big part of help a person change is just showing that you believe in them. You see them for who they were made to be, and love them for who they are. (Stoltzfus, p.8)

Note: An important tool for prepping for a coaching session is reviewing notes from the previous session.

Coaching is client-centered, meaning the client sets the agenda. They decide what goals they want to achieve, and they define the action items. It is the coach's job to ask the right questions to help them discover for themselves what those action items are, and to keep them accountable by following up with them on their progress. The premise behind this is that people retain information better if it is self-discovered, rather than taught.

Often the clients being coached need that motivation to "buy into" their discoveries however. Coaches come alongside to encourage, equip, support, and provide accountability. One way to do this is every time the client states an action step they would like to commit to, the coach makes "a note of it and then asks for a progress report on that step the next time they meet."(Stoltzfus, p. 13) Keep in mind that "Being motivated to make a change is more important than knowing what change to make."(Stoltzfus, p. 16)

Personal reflection

The statements about change sound so true. I remember when my father quit smoking a few years back--he had been smoking a few packs a day for 30 years. He always felt that he should quit, that it was unhealthy for him, but he never wanted it badly enough. One day, he went to the doctor for a checkup and the doctor said that his lungs were "making music," meaning they sounded bad. Shortly after that, my father was determined to change in order to live a longer and healthier life. As soon as he felt that determination, he quit cold turkey.

We can help people discover this sort of determination in themselves just by asking questions. Lots of people really don't live by what they really value. If you value long life and health and you're smoking two packs of cigarettes a day, deep down you feel conflicted and dissatisfied. Or if you're working as a mechanic when you've always wanted to be a teacher, there's an untapped potential there that needs to be encouraged.

I'm encouraged by reading this chapter, and I hope to just get better at asking good questions.

Scripture

Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

Philippians 2:3-4 3Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.


Stoltzfus, Tony. 2005. Leadership Coaching: The Disciplines, Skills and Heart of a Christian Coach. Tony Stoltzfus: Virginia Beach, VA